If I was King of the Man-o-Sphere

I would sleep ’til noon every day….

I would declare every Monday National Beer Day….

I would go mountainbiking twice a week and go to the beach the other five….

I would create a site called the real manboobz ™ and dissect the failures of critical thinking of prominent male feminists like Hugo Schwyzer….

I would go over to trainwrecks like The Good Man Project and leave comments under the monicker Troll With a Goal. I would leave the dictionary meaning of “privilege” and say that since this is not how the author is using that word, why should I trust in good faith anything else they say.

I would tell MRA’s to stop being a parody of radical feminism.

I would track down all the neo nazi’s who used to post at Inmalafide and follow them to the darkest corners of the interwebz. I would drop a link to the brutal shower rape scene from American History X and say good job on your “activism” behind every comment RYU and his booty militia leaves across various manosphere blogs.

I would find where all the HBD’ers drink in real life. I would wait ’til they excused themselves to “powder their noses” in the restroom then pee in their Coors Lite-for yes, I can piss a better quality beer….

Remember, kept your wallet fat, your waist lean, your thoughts lewd and your time count 😉

Life is only a party if you make it that way…

Is it okay if I don’t Fat Shame™ you but just make fun of you for being in debt???

Well, strangely, in the good ‘ole USA they are both epidemics and ironically enough one is too much (calories) in, not enough out whereas the other is too much (money) out, not enough in-maybe that would be an inverse relationship….

So I asked the mighty google: “is there a correlation between being overweight and being in debt?”

here is one search result:

“The study found that indebtedness was associated with an increased likelihood of overweight and obesity, even when examined independently of other factors. This means that people who are over-indebted are more likely to be overweight or obese regardless of factors such as income, education, sex, or age – suggesting that over-indebtedness alone can cause obesity.”

another states:
“Overindebtedness affects a series of risk factors for chronic diseases such as leisure time activities, as well as participation in social activities,” the authors concluded, adding that diet could also play a role.

“Energy-dense food such as sweets or fatty snacks are often less expensive compared to food with lower energy density, such as fruit or vegetables,” they added.”

I don’t know which comes first, debt or fat…

I suppose the new manosphere warcry should be “Keep your waist slim and your wallet fat.” However that would distract them from crying about how they aren’t alpha and how HBD is really science™ and not racism in disguise.

Do unto others…

“…That principle accounted for, among other things, the tendency of a man to spend more money on a sweater following his purchase of a suit than before: After being exposed to the price of the larger item, the price of the less expensive one appears smaller by comparison. In the same way, the larger-than-smaller-request procedure makes use of the contrast principle by making the smaller request look even smaller by comparison with the larger one. if I want you to lend me five dollars, I can make it seem like a smaller request by first asking me to lend you ten dollars. One of the beauties of this tactic is that by first requesting ten dollars and then retreating to five dollars, I will have simultaneously engaged the force of reciprocity rule and the contrast principle. Not only will my five-dollar request be viewed as a concession to be reciprocated, it will also look to you a smaller request than if I had just asked for it straightaway.”

Robert B. Cialdini, Influence, How and Why People Agree to Things

or as Metallica once said-Fight Fire With Fire…

Do unto others as they have done unto you
But what in the hell is this world coming to?
Blow the universe into nothingness
Nuclear warfare shall lay us to rest …

….sometimes I’m not so articulate, but sometimes, somethings should just be left to fail….

The Real Peterman left a great comment on the thread where I exchanged words with Elam.

“Paul, maybe a better way of looking at it would be to imagine someone who has never heard of the MRM or Amanda Marcotte or David Futrelle, and reads a MRM-related website for the first time. What do you want them to see? An article about equal rights or a link to a white supremacist organization? A discussion about how divorce courts harm men or a rant about how the government is out to get people who follow the paleo diet?

That’s a good point about people who will lie whether we give them ammunition or not. But if those people tell a vicious lie about us to someone and that someone goes to a manosphere website and sees a link to white separatists, they will be more likely to believe that lie.

You are right that a person doesn’t have to approve of everything on a website to approve of that site. There are Democrats and Republicans posting at A Voice For Men, but that’s alright because those differences can be put aside for a common goal. But some differences I can’t abide, and other people can’t, either, such as saying white people are better than other people. That crosses a line. I can forgive someone who likes a different tax policy than I do, but I can’t forgive racism.

If anyone wants to ask me what I’ve done for the MRM, well, I suppose I haven’t done anything. But I’d rather do nothing to the MRM than hurt it by linking it to nuts like white supremacists.”

Anyways, towards the end, this is where he probably has a different view than I do.

“Paul, I like and appreciate A Voice For men and the work you do there. Keep up the good work!”

My feeling is more like someone who truly believes in the free market that some companies that have a poor product and bad management should just go bankrupt. That’s what I feel with the current MRM.

Lets go with this analogy a little further, since Elam did bring up status–“Let me know when you actually DO something yourself, other than second guess those that have more to say than to nitpick other MRAs.” & “Get a job, son, and quickly. You have turned your opinionating into a mothers basement video game.” Let’s assume he is a business owner and I’m a lowly Sales Rep or cashier. Well, he comes into the the shop once a week. He might have 30+ years in the industry. He might have more education, more wealth, more experience, more status. Well, there’s one thing he doesn’t have at this point. I’m on the front lines. I’m dealing with the so-called customers. I’m hearing their complaints. Sure, it’s human nature that people love to whine and some of the complaints are just people who are hung over and want to take it out on someone. But then there are a lot of legitimate complaints. Customer X tells me how the product broke after three weeks of light use. Customer Y tells me how she had to wait 90 minutes on the phone to get someone to talk to her. Customer Z tells me something that is a hybrid of the first two complaints. I start seeing some serious problems and try to tell the business owner.

He responds, “Son, you just don’t have CONFIDENCE. Don’t you know that our product was rated the 1 best buy in 2004 and 2006? I’ve been in this business since longer than you knew how to get yer dick hard and jack off. And by the looks of you, that’s all your doing right now. When I was your age, I had to swat the ladies off like flies.”

I’m looking down, saying “Yes, Sir.” Inside my head I’m thinking, man, I’m giving you key information on how you can improve your business. I’m telling you where the flaws are in your business model and your INSULTING me? I’m trying to help. Man, tomorrow I’m gonna be dropping of an application at Competitor A, I’ve heard they have a better commission structure and they did win the best buy award in 2010 and 2012. Maybe I can work the same amount of hours and go from 22k a year to 30+k. If they don’t hire me, there is always Competitor B–can’t be any worse, right? All the while I am thinking the company deserves to go bankrupt, I’m just figuring some way to get out before they take me down too. This isn’t a sinking ship I owe my life too.

So maybe you see what I’m trying to say or maybe it wasn’t a good analogy. But A Voice For Men IS NOT my voice! Simple as that. There may be an insightful article here or there. But this movement isn’t doing it, time to let it die off and something much better come along.

It’s offical, I will never be an MRA….

I just got “insulted” by Paul Elam…..

Interesting how he didn’t engage my bigger point about how tolerating the White Nationbalists makes his movement look stupid. well, maybe it really is stupid or maybe he secretly likes those guys. Yeah, I don’t think I need approval by someone who says “At a Rape Trial Acquit.”

I also, can’t be a male feminist, cause, y’know Dave Fatrelle likes to take things I said then putt other stuff behind it to change the meaning then put a flashing “sarcasm” button behind it.

Unfortunately I haven’t been called a creep yet by Amanda Marcotte-gotta work harder to have strange mannerisms and awkward pauses 😉

I also can’t be a full on manosphere guy, cause y’know I ain’t white enough, fat enough or pathetic enough. Oh, well I just don’t fit in. That’s probably a good thing….

time to enjoy some musical entertainment from Meshugahh-that’s Yiddsh for Crazy and crack open a cold beer 😉

…diet much !?!….

well, I’m not exactly the most disciplined guy in the universe…

In fact, I’ve never gone on an official diet my entire life…

You might see all these dudes bragging about the Caveman ™ diet. Hehehe, I wonder if In N Out protein style qualifies. I also don’t think I can follow a diet that requires I give up chocolate milkshakes. Anyways, if I was a caveman, I’d also hunt and gather my food so my calorie output would be much higher. I’m not a dietician, so whadda ya doing listening to me rant about this anyways?

I have a secret, I like cooking-grilling, stir frying, yeah, even baking pre-made pizza’s. I’m not very good, mostly self taught. Mostly trial and error. Does admitting I enjoy cooking make me less of a man?

So, one thing I found that helped me… When I was unemployed awhile back, I didn’t eat out much. Of course I was trying to save money but I also had FREE TIME. What I would do is read the labels. If a product had mono poly disaturide xhulnazhyny yellow #69 and a whole bunch of other chemistry sounding words I couldn’t pronounce, it went back on the shelf. I didn’t know about calorie counting and still don’t–seems a little math intensive for me. Just a general rule I go by is fresher is better.

Another thing I realized, I’d eat allot because of stress. When I wasn’t working, I’d eat slower and be satiated on less food. I wouldn’t snack as much. I’d workout more…

A little while back I cut soda from my diet. I tried cutting beer but some things just can’t go 😉 I’ll occasionally have a Mexican Coca-Cola. You might think that with the drug cartels and all it might have coke-well not that I know of. What it does have is real sugar instead of high fruitcose corn syrup. Tastes a little sweeter, a certain something I just can’t putt a finger on.

Anyways, I love all kinds of food. Vietnamese, Thai, Indian, Mexican, Italian. Hahaha, don’t tell this to any of the manosphere White Nationalists butt bandits. They might call me a multiculturalist. Yeah, well I might call ’em dirtbag racists. I like different things and I started adding spices to my stirfries. Each one turns out different. Let the close minded eat their three meals of McDonalds and Burger King–with the fourth meal made of chihuahua’s droppings, that crap ain’t for me. Hahaha, maybe the White Nationalists Stink Tankers might run into a male feminist in line at the drivethrough and they could flash each other their manboobz 😉

I love food and I pig out when I get the chance. Now, I really ain’t skinny, but in America, not too morbidly obese is the new skinny. Sorry for discouraging that big dieting guy I work with who saw me stuffing my face without any guilt…

Lick That Kitty, You Misogynistic Douchebag (Reprint)

I had originally published a short post here.

I further expanded upon those ideas here.

It then appeared at Inmalafide on Oct.5,2011. A few editorial changes were made, not by me. It may have increased readability but unfortunately changed what I was trying to say. Below is the original draft I sent to Ferdidnand Bardimu:

Lick That Kitty, You Misogynistic Douchebag!!!!

My interest in sociology, gender and kink takes me across blogsphere, sometimes even into Feminist territory. I’ve seen some interesting posts at Feministe lately. Jill Filipovic has a post where she states that heterosexual men who don’t like giving oral sex are misogynists. The article is called Dealbreaker Indeed. She also has an article entitled In Defense of Period Sex. She states “I have met a grand total of one dude in my entire life who was like “no” on the period sex (for the record, he wasn’t saying no in the moment; it was a general conversation, not a negotiation). His reasoning was “it’s gross.” And when I stopped seeing him approximately 24 hours after that conversation, my reasoning was, “I don’t want to be with someone who thinks that a natural, healthy uterus-having body is gross.”

Amanda Marcotte has stated her dislike of something that occurs naturally on the face of most men. Here is the snipet from Pandagon: “*Beards. Hate ‘em. I don’t mean like a couple day’s stubble that you routinely remove, but like a full-on beard. It’s not like I wouldn’t be friends with a guy with a beard, but kissing a dude with a beard puts me way off. I’m super glad to be off the market in our times of “mountain man” being a style. I object to that style in total, but also just really don’t like beards, which I refer to as “germ farm face pube crumb catchers”….” So using the logic of her sister-in-arms, Jill, does that not make her something most feminists claim doesn’t exist–a misandrist?

Below is a video of a great guy who probably performed countless acts of cunnilingus and had an awesome beard….

Now I love Dimebag’s great guitar playing, but furthermore, he was truly a larger than life character. I’m not trying to psychoanalyze the guy–he obviously had an image as a rebel. Dime wasn’t following the corporate business casual dress code or playing by the rules to get laid by mainstream women. He had a persona that yelled to the world, “This is who I am and I don’t give a fuck.” A beard was a part of that, perhaps not essential, but a part for sure…..

A beard is a secondary sex characteristic of an adult male. Some men such as Sikhs and Hasidic Jews use it as part of their cultural identity. Some men may hide facial imperfections such as a double chin with this. And if this strikes you as deceptive, women can hide large ears with longer hair if they choose. (I won’t even bring makeup or high heels into this.)
Surely, many men opt to shave their facial hair to placate women or be more competitive in the corporate work environment. That is their body and their choice.

At the risk of getting into politically incorrect territory here–howabout looking at things from another viewpoint. Let’s say you see a guy with a “No Fat Chicks” bumper sticker on his pickup–I think even non-feminist, mainstream women might call him a misogynist or at the very least a jerk. However, isn’t being overweight a lifestyle choice. Granted, it’s not the same choice as what to wear in the morning. It is lifestyle choices of exercise and diet compounded over months and years. Understood, there are some people with medical problems that can’t lose the weight but the point still holds for the majority. Isn’t the man with the bumper sticker merely voicing a preference, even if rudely?

As far as Jill Filipovic’s Dealbreakers–Alright, I can appreciate how someone might desire certain sex acts. I also think it is wrong for someone to aggressively push their needs onto a reluctant partner. It would be up to the couple to discuss and negotiate their boundaries. If they could not reach an agreement–fair enough, maybe it is time for them to break up. However, calling someone a misogynist seems like a manipulative bullying move. It seems to say I want this and you owe it to me because of my politics. Would a women who didn’t give blow jobs be considered a misandrist? Maybe she has a gag reflex, maybe she just doesn’t like the taste. Being intimate with your partner shouldn’t be about feeling forced into pleasing the other. Ideally, it should be a situation where both parties are fulfilled. Some men love eating pussy and some men don’t. Some women love sucking cock and some don’t. Really, it’s a matter of compatibility.

….to befuddle….

So I was doing some reading and I came across a new (to me) word….

Obfuscate….

Well, from the dictionary:

transitive verb
1
a : darken b : to make obscure
2
: confuse
intransitive verb
: to be evasive, unclear, or confusing

This jumped right out at me when I read it. Seems like some are using words like “privilege” with a different meaning than what’s in the dictionary in the so called “gender” discussions are just obfuscating the issue…

From the Great Wiki:

“Obfuscation may be used for many purposes. Doctors have been accused of using jargon to conceal unpleasant facts from a patient; American author Michael Crichton claimed that medical writing is a “highly skilled, calculated attempt to confuse the reader”.[1] B. F. Skinner, noted psychologist, commented on medical notation as a form of multiple audience control, which allows the doctor to communicate to the pharmacist things which might be opposed by the patient if they could understand it.[2] Similarly text-based language, like some forms of leet, are obfuscated to make them incomprehensible to outsiders.”

Next time I’m immersed in one of these viscous debates that take place online, I might say, Dear Sir/Mam, I checked the dictionary definition of the word you just used and it doesn’t line up with what you are saying. Is there something I don’t get or are you trying to obfuscate the issue? Sure it probably won’t make me seem like the sharpest tool in the shed and it pobably won’t make me more loved than I already am 😉 but at least it might make a few others in the thread start asking the “uncomfortable” questions.