…who defines masculinity…

I saw this at Barbarosaaaa’s…

“Men can no longer safely rely on being told by some socital standard, “now you are a man”, those times have past, and the days of the lingering facade numbered. The post-feminist man is a man when he himself is able to tell himself he is a man and believe it. He decides for himself. Before Medieval times, Barbarians, Greeks, Romans, it was chiefly elder men who dictated the rites of passage into manhood. During and after the Romance period women began dictating when a male became a man. This lead to a vision of manhood almost exclusively tailored to suit the needs to women. Men now have no other choice than to become self-deterministic in regards to their identity.”

yuppers, The Good Man Project, Jezzebel and the so-called man-0-sphere doesn’t have a fucking thing to tell me about masculinity…

12 thoughts on “…who defines masculinity…

  1. Given that we are in a time of cultural flux, the old standards may not apply, at least not in an intuitive sense. On the other hand, the old standards have worked for millenia, so there is the track record going for it.

    One thing’s certain, Jizzabel has nothing to say about masculinity, modern or otherwise. It can be quite entertaining to read the ramblings of the feminist mind, and it’s informative in the sense that you can learn how fucked up the feminist brainwashing has made the modern woman, but that’s really about it.

    The Manosphere has some good stuff, but you have to seperate the wheat from the chaff. More than anything, my biggest complaint is that it is too reliant on being a virtual community, and needs to move out into meatspace. I think it’s quite okay to encourage men, particularly younger men (18-25) and the mature men (35-45), to lift wieghts and do extra cardio, and engage in healthy nutrition (nod the latest fad diet) to maintain better health. It’s okay to discuss how x is stacked against them, and possible strategies to fight it. I hate the “echo chamber” effect on certain sites. These are important issues, and keeping them hidden away on a hundred or so sites where people have to stumble across them by accident isn’t doing any more good than $3,000/weekend pickup bootcamps (do people still fall for that shit?)

    1. Unfortunately there is allot of chaff to sort through…

      I knew a guy IRL who became obsessed with Red Pill/Blue Pill. I tried to tell him it’s an extremely one dimensional way to look at things…

      He finally “woke up.”

      1. …and, my bigger point was that a man should be able to choose his own masculinity rather than look outside for what it is to be a man.

        I originally heard “toxic masculinity” and was fascinated because I thought it was going to be an article about how men are given a raw deal by society. Then I saw it was the typical femanazi shit where anyone who has a penis is evillle because patriarchy…

  2. I wouldn’t ostracize Nazis by comparing them to feministers.

    Like it or not, the outside world decides what is masculine, and whether or not it’s a good thing; that last part is a cyclical phenomenon. Unfortunately, we’re living through a prolonged period where masculinity is being marginalized by a lot of people with a lot of power.

    1. BTR,

      haha, that sounds like PC in reverse…

      I’ve often said, don’t cal Mandy Marcotte a bitch, it’s extremely dissrespectful to female dogs.

      Obviously one doesn’t exist in a vacuum but here’s where I was going:

      “Yup, it seems men don’t have value for existing, just what they can do for others, especially women… Is this the real reason why all the weirdo’s at Manboobz hate Men Going Their Own Way? Maybe if those MRA types are planning to get anything done, they should talk about a new life script for males instead of just whining. Where am I going with this, you ask? Let’s say you have a son who loves music. Instead of bullying him into cutting his hair, getting a degree and getting a boring 9-to-5 in an office, maybe you should support his dreams of becoming the next Eddie Van Halen. I’m not saying you should pay all his bills while he lives in the basement ’till he is 40. I’m suggesting that you should let him have more flexibility than the traditional script. Y’know the flexibilty that women have had for the past 40 years. Some women want to pursue higher education, some want to be stay at home moms, some want to be starving artists. There needs to be a change in gender roles where men are seen as more than a walking paycheck.”

      https://stonerwithaboner.wordpress.com/2012/06/07/work-sucks-reprint/

      1. Who is going to support your son if he fails? Females can be flexible because they have the option of falling back on parasitic gender roles and getting men to support them. Men cant do that

      2. Great point…

        the old ways don’t work anymore…

        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Male_unemployment

        however, it is many more men who put their eggs in one basket and “go for it” than women. These men don’t have a safety net.

        I interviewed for an aggressive, commission only sales job one time. It was only guys interviewing and working in that capacity. Where were the femmies crying about the wage gap on that one???

  3. Places like Good Men Project can only do so much in regards to defining masculinity. In the end its up to the individual man to decide it for himself. I like (most) of what goes on over there but they can’t be the ones to decide if you are a man or not.

    Trying to develop some universal standard of manhood has been a nightmare for a lot of men over the years. Men are gonna have to start doing it for themselves.

    1. I thought TGMP was awful. More telling men that if it isn’t in womyn’s interest, it’s misogyny.

      There is no universal standard of masculinity. There might be recurring themes but there isn’t one be-all-end-all.

      Who would be more manly? A buffed up private in the military, who has little control or say in how things are done or someone like myself who could not handle military life and chooses to live his own way?

      1. “I thought TGMP was awful. More telling men that if it isn’t in womyn’s interest, it’s misogyny.”

        Oh that sentiment is there and its been coming out more and more since the main brains behind the place are now just copping to GMP being a pro feminist space (which they tried to deny for a while).

        But if you can wade through the posts that are are nothing more than advertisements for feminism and and posts that buy into the idea that men respecting women is the only thing that needs to happen for gender equality to happen there is actual good stuff there.

        Despite all the bad that goes on there there is good going on. If nothing else there is some room for men to speak up in their own words, even if they are words women don’t want to hear (don’t get me wrong those words tend to not get the same attention as the ones that women/feminists approve of).

  4. Well, while I certainly agree with you about the life script thing, at some point if you want something bad enough, you’ll learn what you have to do to manage your resources to be able to do it, whether living in Mom and/or Dad’s basement, getting your own place, or sharing a two-bedroom house with seven other people.

    Option three is the best of all worlds in my opinion. You can keep your personal financial costs lower, you can keep your time constraints lower (unless you let people walk all over you), and you can gain some social aptitude simply by having that many people in your life on a constant basis. If you chose your housemates well, you can learn a lot of useful stuff and present interesting opportunities within the group. It’s also a good way to learn how people really act in meatspace.

    That’s why I’m still sort of against the notion of “needing to have your own space”, when said space is 1000 sq ft of overpriced apartment with amenities. It just encourages you to get more shit than you really need, pay more money than you really need to pay out, and in the end, only serves to support the bank accounts of realtors and property management companies.

    “There is no universal standard of masculinity. There might be recurring themes but there isn’t one be-all-end-all. ”

    That nailed it.

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