“sometimes as a guy you have to hide your pain–and humor is a great way to do that…”

so this video is going around…

I really don’t have much to say on female on male rape nor do I want to get into some esoteric debate on whether it is “rape” or “forced to penetrate”…

The thing that struck me is that he’s saying that as a man, humor IS THE ONLY ACCEPTABLE
WAY TO EXPRESS PAIN. Everything else is weakness and failure.

Maybe this is the real reason you see so many more male comedians that females. Maybe it’s not teh eville patriarchy ™ forcing womyn away from careers in comedy, it’s just they have many more socially acceptable avenues to fully express themselves…

6 thoughts on ““sometimes as a guy you have to hide your pain–and humor is a great way to do that…”

  1. That’s a very good point. I have watched this video 3 times and reblogged it from Toy Soldier a few days ago. It’s still quite painful to watch, honestly. Even more so now that I consider your post here…I handle my own sadness by being quiet/stoic when left alone or with humor if I’m in public. However, due to the way society views female-bodied people I *could* choose to cry and not be seen as a wimp. Not so for male-bodied folks, who are “restricted” to either laughter or anger.

    1. Yes, laughter or anger are really the only things acceptable for a man’s “emotional palette.” Being that I was into things like music and visual arts, I was always a bit more into my emotions and perception (those two overlap) than most. Being restricted to just laughter and anger is like telling a foodie it’s just pizza and hot dogs. Not only boring but somehow excruciatingly limiting. I haven’t seen the M(H)RM’s or man-0-sphere talk about it but men should be given less restrictions. I’m not talking about the bullshit at noseriouslywhataboutthemenz where they say guys should be able to wear tutu’s. I’m talking about men being able to have more emotions and not be seen as automatons who just want to fuck, drink lite beer and watch sports. American society gives males an extremely limited role of provider/protector/earning machine. Being able to drop out of the workforce to pursue artistic goals or things like travel shouldn’t be only an option for the independently wealthy, y’know.

      1. “I haven’t seen the M(H)RM’s or man-0-sphere talk about it but men should be given less restrictions. I’m not talking about the bullshit at noseriouslywhataboutthemenz where they say guys should be able to wear tutu’s. I’m talking about men being able to have more emotions and not be seen as automatons who just want to fuck, drink lite beer and watch sports.”

        An interesting conversation came up a few months ago over on M3’s blog which involved me saying that men can be kind, gentle, loving, tender, etc. and that it’s grossly unfair that they are so rarely shown this way. After the response I got from 2 (male) commenters over there, you’d have thought I said infanticide is my favorite pastime. I was unequivocally told that men are *not* weak or emotional, nor should they ever be encouraged to be such.

        I was surprised by this backlash, as the majority of men I’ve spoken to online are like yourself…they *want* to be accepted as having the full range of human emotion. As for those guys, I pointed out that the traits I listed are ones you usually find in men who are good fathers or caretakers. That settled the conversation down by a few notches, but I was still confused by the initial reaction.

        Are there that many red pill men who are so conditioned to their allotted emotions that they automatically rebel against having more options? Or did I miss something else entirely aka they thought I was saying men should be overly emotional like most women?

        If I can find the post, I’ll link to it. The whole thing was fascinating.

  2. There’s also the thing that women, as a whole, tend not to be funny.

    But humor often delves into brutal truths, and women tend to shy away from activities which will get them ostracized by “teh groop”. Also, listenign to a woman bitch about… being a woman gets old after 30 seconds, and that tends to be the basis for a lot of comediennes’ humor. Nothing funny about PMS, but it’s bound to creep into any set over 5 minutes long. Yawn.

    That’s not to say women don’t appreciate dark humor. Used correctly, it’s a good way to get “in” with a woman, if that’s your thing. PUAs don’t go into this much, because most of them are about as funny as a root canal, and there’s NOTHING funny about that.

    1. @bringthereality

      How does using dark humor help to pick up women? My sense of humor is 90% wittiness/wordplay, often with a subtle innuendo thrown in (which men usually find funny) and 10% self-sardonic (which guys have told me is “refreshing” to hear from a gal). In my experience it is always easier to get men to laugh or at least crack a smile than the vast majority of women.

      Dark humor can be funny, I suppose…but most of the time it is pretty tasteless or even downright offensive. I mean, the women on The View were using “dark humor” when talking about the Kieu case, and that just made me nauseous and angry.

      1. Tarnished,

        actually wanted to reply to your comment above this one…

        “An interesting conversation came up a few months ago over on M3′s blog which involved me saying that men can be kind, gentle, loving, tender, etc. and that it’s grossly unfair that they are so rarely shown this way. After the response I got from 2 (male) commenters over there, you’d have thought I said infanticide is my favorite pastime. I was unequivocally told that men are *not* weak or emotional, nor should they ever be encouraged to be such.”

        This is more what I mean when I talk about giving men more flexibility:

        https://stonerwithaboner.wordpress.com/2012/06/07/work-sucks-reprint/

        What you say reminds me of a Henry Rollins spoken word thing and part of the Metallica: Some Kind of Monster movie where Lars said that James was a much kinder, gentler soul than the persona he put forth as frontman of Metallica.

        “Are there that many red pill men who are so conditioned to their allotted emotions that they automatically rebel against having more options?”

        I’m not a fan of the red pill/blue pill dicotomy…

        https://stonerwithaboner.wordpress.com/2012/08/04/pill-popperz-and-other-assorted-looney-tunes/

        Anyways as far as what BTR said, I think I see the points he is making…

        much humor is based on the taboo-that goes back to the video where the guy says humor was the only way to express his pain.

        you probably noticed the class clown was more likely to be a boy than a girl. Later in life, that guy probably figured that humor could help him attract a woman.

        There is a fine line between humor and sarcasm-sarcasm is a weapon. That being said, I read that most comedians score low in agreeableness if you were to give them a psychology test. They probably feel fine masking it as “humor.” Infact, that’s what that bully boy male feminist lap dog Futrelle does.

        I did find Roseanne funny back in the day though…

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